Ummm....it's triplets!

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Ummm....it's triplets! or at least there are 3 sacs...we'll see next week
:-)


~*~Update~*~
Ok, so we're home now. So, triplets. Yea, triplets. We're obviously excited to be pregnant, but definitely a bit freaked out at all that triplets bring with them: First and foremost the risks to their and my health, never mind the additional upfront expenses (new car any one?). We're both aware that if all 3 are viable we don't have an easy road ahead of us.

Being that I am only 5.5 weeks there were no heartbeats yet, next week we'll know more for sure. My nurse even warned me that sometimes the body will reject 1 or more of the sacs because there are more.

That said....We're still processing all this. I do know that 2 of the sacs were measuring at a 15, and one was only at a 10. As we have always said it's all in God's hands, and we are trusting Him through this. If we go back next week and we still have 3 little ones we know that it will be ok, and if it's not, it will still be ok.

Of course, we're anticipating everyone's response to triplets and having 4 under 3....it's a good thing we like kids and would like more than 2 or 3 :-)

Peace.....

Since we've had Avelyn there has always been a part of me that was stressed, uneasy, worried, that she would be an only child. I truly believe, that in some ways, going through IF treatment the second time around is harder, because it wasn't just about us anymore, it was about her.

I didn't realize how big of a weight this was on my shoulders, until G, our nurse, called last week to tell me I was officially pregnant. Hearing those words, realizing that Ave is going to be a big sister was just awesome!

Of course, it's now a week until my ultrasound, and being that I feel relatively ok, outside of heartburn and not really wanting to eat and being a bit tired [which could all be because of the extreme heat this week], I'm getting nervous again. What if we go in there, despite awesome betas, and there is no baby(ies)? I'm trying not to think about it, because I honestly don't think that will be the case, but of course I feel like I should be physically feeling a lot worse.

I'm not even sure what I should expect to see next week. When I was pregnant with Ave we didn't have an ultrasound until 6 weeks and her heart was already beating away...I'll only be 5 weeks and a few days. I guess we'll just have to wait patiently.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
On a side note that really had me laughing HARD:

The hugest crush I ever had in middle/high school keeps popping up on facebook as a suggested friend, but there has never been a profile picture. There was one today. OH MY GOODNESS!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I know it's mean, but I have not stopped laughing. He's bald, paunch-bellied, dark rings around his eyes, he looks like a cross between Lurch and Uncle Fester from the Adams' family.

This guy was drop dead gorgeous in school: Tall, blond hair, blue eyes, football and basketball star. Just a dream.....wow! To think I would have done anything to get with him in whatever way possible. Thank you God for never letting that happen. I definitely have a much, MUCH better catch in Matt (he's at least still Hot, amongst other things ;-).

Beta #2 and other updates

Just got my call from the RE....my beta is up to 2401, which they liked. They wanted to schedule my ultrasound for this Friday, but I have no one to watch Ave....absolutely no one.

I was hoping to get in next Saturday (which would be 6 weeks) since it's the next day that Matt has off, but they don't do any u/s appointments on Saturdays. Which leaves me in a quandary.....there's no day then that Matt can go with me for our first u/s. I went from being "yay!" for a good Beta to now wanting to sit here and cry, because Matt can't go. I'm really, really upset....and I know that's silly, but I could hear in his voice that he was disappointed too.


ETA:
Matt is going with me....Tuesday at 1:30.

This just in....

The RE called and I am indeed PREGNANT!!!!

Greta, my nurse, said my number was 157 or 175 (I can't remember and will ask Matt)....for counting Ave was 64 at 16 DPIUI....I'd say that's pretty good.

I go on Tuesday for another beta, which they emailed me that. I do have one question, which I can call and ask, is that my beta on my web file says 472.....Think I need to know which number it is :-)

But....I'm pregnant! I'm figuring on a February 14th due date, based off of Ave being born exactly 9 months after our IUI.

I will post more later, but Little Girl wants to go run around outside.


~*~Update~*~
I just talked to my nurse at the RE, and confirmed that it is the 472 number. It could go either way as to multiples or a singleton....regardless: We're ecstatic!

I feel like I can breath with this pregnancy. Ave's number was on the lower side so I was nervous about it being ok. As we all know, things can still go wrong, but I feel better about it.

We're home!

We're finally HOME! We were discharged this morning and home around 11:00am. We're all doing well. The dogs are already very protective and loving of Avelyn!

Now here are the details of the "Great Event":

Friday I had the NST/BPP and all looked good; I was to call my doctor on Monday about scheduling an induction for this week.

Saturday we got up and went to the store; I was there until about 2pm (6 hours). My back was bothering me a bit and I felt a bit achy/crampy. I went home baked some brownies, cooked dinner...Matt got home around 8 and we ate dinner and watched a movie.

I had started having some mild contractions around 6:30-7:00pm, but didn't think too much of them (I'd had the same thing the morning before and it had stopped after a couple of hours). Slowly they were getting closer together. Finally we decided to just go to bed (around 12), but that lasted for all of 15 minutes....it was not too comfy to be laying down. Every time I had a contraction I felt like I had to pee, so I kept getting up to go to the bathroom. At one point I thought to myself, "I wonder if my water will ever break", and then I felt a "POP". I expected to get out of bed and be gushing everywhere, but it was just barely a trickle. I called the hospital and said to them what had been happening and they said to come in.

We got to the hospital around 1:00am (my parents and sister, and Matt's mom and sister arrived a few minutes later). I was doing all right....but felt a lot of discomfort in my back.

Around 2:30am I was kneeling on a pillow, just breathing through the contractions and ignoring everyone in the room. Around 2:45am I started feeling really strong urges to push....but fought against them (the Dr wasn't here and there were 2 other labors in progress). Finally the Dr arrived and they let me start pushing.

I pushed for about 4-5 contractions and she was born. I had some slight tearing (needed a few stitches). The placenta was stuck and the dr had to literally reach in me and pull all of it out: I think that and being stitched without being really numbed hurt more than anything. Even the contractions weren't that painful...more of a burning.

I did however, during pushing, tell DH we're adopting the rest or he could give birth next. I didn't have any meds (pain included) and DH was an awesome coach (he was perfect). So while the doctor was fixing me up Matt went with Avelyn to get weighed and introduce her to the rest of our family. It all went really fast: I asked to use the Jacuzzi when we got there and never even got the chance :-(

Around 4:30am everyone went home and we were left alone for a bit...Matt and I tried to get some sleep.

All in all, I couldn't have asked for a better, easier experience...and we couldn't have asked for a more beautiful or more perfect daughter...she is well worth all of the struggles and frustrations of the past 3 years.

Now for your viewing pleasure :-) PICTURES!!!!!

The slideshow isn't really in order and we still have to get the pictures off the other 6 cameras that were there.

Avelyn Margaret
November 1, 2009
2:37am
8lbs 5oz 21" long

Home again, home again jiggidy jog....

All is well. NST went well: She's responding correctly and having no issues with distress. They also did a BPP (u/s) and all looks good there too. I'm to call Dr. G on Monday to discuss what our course of action is, providing I haven't gone in to labor by then (which would be nice).

I'll probably write a longer post later, but just wanted to keep you guys updated :-)

3 hours of contrax this morning, now nothing...

I woke up at 2 with really strong contrax (like they hurt a bit), they were 15 minutes apart, then 7 minutes. I didn't wake Matt up, because he had to be up anyways at 4 to go to work (of course he's in northern PA today, 2 hours away from the hospital)... after he left I went back to bed and drifted off around 5, and slept until 8:30. Absolutely nothing from 5-8...I'm glad I didn't get all excited and say "let's go to the hospital!"

I have my NST in 2 hours and I'll mention it to the dr then. My dr. is great and she won't induce unless I say so...she'd probably let me go until November 9 (which would be 2 weeks past due) as long as baby is ok and I'm ok. I'm sure they're going to measure contractions today and maybe I am having good, regular contrax, but I just don't notice them very much.

If the NST and amniotic levels don't look good today, they'll induce today or tomorrow, if it looks fine and we want to go ahead, we would induce next mid-week or just wait. At this point, if they ask me today "Do you want to have this baby today?" I'm asking what their method of induction will be, and may consider telling them yes.

I have to think my cervix is a good 4 (possibly 5) cms (it was a good 3cm on Monday). I honestly don't know what to do: Part of me is of the school "if she's not ready yet, she's not ready. No need to force it" and part of me is like I really want her to be born, just because I want her here with us.

Just last night I was asking Matt if he was ok with waiting until next Thursday to induce her and he was, now I'm half hoping they say all is good, but do you want her to be born today? I don't know. If I just knew a date I'd be ok with waiting. I've never been a patient individual.

(disclaimer: I don't think the contrax had anything to do with the little bit of castor oil and OJ I drank at 3:30 yesterday afternoon. It had very little effect on anything.)

......... and so we wait

Nothing happening here: I just got home from working in the store (6 hours). Yesterday I worked on my leaf blocks and got about 10 of those done....only 46 more to go and then all of the strips to surround each leaf. There's really not much to report...I'm sure no one wants to hear about my loading and running and unloading the dishwasher, doing laundry, taking a nap etc etc. It's been real excitin'!

My mother and I decided that I would try castor oil this afternoon. It worked for her with my sister and honestly the worst it can do is make me go to the bathroom (neither of us have diarrhea issues, we have the opposite problem). I mixed myself a small glass of OJ with a tablespoon of castor oil; it seriously wasn't that bad...I've taken far more disgusting things (how about grapeseed oil extract, goldenseal extract, or acephatita[sp?]...those things are nasty!).

I figure I'd give it a shot! Matt has told me he doesn't want to work the route tomorrow and would much rather spend the night in the hospital with this baby being born. Of course if nothing happens, he's going on the route and I'm going for my NST at 11am. If working on my feet for 6 hours, castor oil, and bouncing on my yoga ball don't start labor, then she's just not ready.

Don't worry....I will NOT walk out of this house without posting on here, facebook, and thebump. I will not leave you all hanging. If there's no posts, there's no labor :-)

Update on me: She'll be here next Tuesday at the latest.

Had my last OB appt this morning. I'm a solid 3cm and am very soft and stretchy. Doctor said she could induce me 10/28 if I wanted, but I'd rather not be induced.

I go on Friday for an NST and pending those results they'll check my amniotic fluids...and if I need to have this baby NOW after that appt, they'll induce me Fri/Sat.

Otherwise, we're waiting until 11/3 and will induce me then. I'm just praying she shows up before this Friday. I'd really rather not be induced....I'm more afraid of that than actual labor. Something about the pitocin makes me really nervous, especially consider it immediately ups the chance of a c-section (which I REALLY don't want!).

40 weeks 1 day (1 day overdue)

How far along: 40 Weeks 1 day
Total weight gain/loss: I think it's around 11-13 lbs, I've been holding steady where I am.
Maternity clothes: Now that I'm home from work...some of my sun dresses with a sweater over them, capris (non maternity) and some maternity Ts: I'm a regular fashion maven!
Stretch marks: How could there not be at this point?!
Sleep: Waking up at 1am, 4am, and 7am to pee: My biggest sleep complaint is the numb hands.
Best moment this week: Last day of work!
Movement: Still squirming about.
Food cravings: Ice cold water
Gender: Girl!
Labor signs: I'm seriously having issues with this: I have some tightening of my belly, sharp crampy feelings, and some discomfort, but I have no idea if any of it is actually a contrax or means anything at all. I have a really high pain tolerance, so now I'm worried that I could be having contrax and not even really know it. I'm still getting globs of my MP. I find out tomorrow if I'm any further along.
Belly button in or out: It's out by the evening...or at least partially out.
What I miss: People not being interested in the current status of my uterus and cervix.
I am looking forward to: THIS BABY SHOWING UP! (as I said before, I'm not uncomfortable, I just know how much Matt wants to see her)
Weekly wisdom: We really have no idea what we're doing lol
Milestones: I guess being 40 weeks is a milestone.

There's seriously nothing much going on. I keep hoping my water is going to break so that we know SOMETHING is going on. We keep working on different inducing methods, but we know none of them will work unless my body's ready. I have been sitting on my yoga ball and bouncing...trying to get her more down (she's pretty down).

This morning Matt pulled the Moby out of the packaging and played with that for an hour, with a stuffed pig as the baby. He really likes the moby. I think it's also going to be the solution for our going to church issue. It looks really complex to put on (but isn't) and we're hoping if he wears her at church no one will demand to hold her or be touching her. We'll see if it works.

We also played with our Boppy sling, which is what I like...it's a lot easier to get on than the Moby, especially by yourself. I think Matt's build is just too big for the sling...he said he feels very choked in it.

Of course after pulling both those things out we decided they should probably be washed, and might as well wash the carseat cover* at the same time (*I talked to the state trooper who did our carseat inspection and he recommended that we wash it, since it's been sitting in a box with plastic for over a year [it is brand new, but the manufactured date was 10/2008]. I asked him about the flame retardant factor, and he said that it won't wash out in one washing: So in the tub and on the line it went).

On the scientific side of things: I keep thinking about how arbitrary a due date is. We know the exact date of conception and it still means nothing. I asked Matt if he thought since it took a while (16dpiui) to get a positive HPT, that she was a late implanter and that could be it. I honestly find the whole thing fascinating. If I were to go back to school it would probably for something to do with infertility or a midwife. I just find the whole thing extremely interesting.

My mom called last night at 9:30pm to inform me that my sister is sick (of course she was over here for a few hours in the afternoon, but I was doing things and she was on the couch). So sister has a 102* fever, chills, and is achy (sounds like the flu...yay!). Fortunately I don't think I'm going to get it, but I did tell my mom that they need to make sure the rest of them don't catch it otherwise they're quarantined and not allowed in the hospital or here to visit, should the baby be born. She gave me this very sad sounding "I know". Poor Oma!

Tomorrow morning I have another Dr appt and I have two thoughts on that: 1) I'll get in there and nothing will have changed (BOO! HISS!) or 2) I'll be 4-5cms and they want to admit me immediately (Matt's not going to the appt). I think I'm more worried about #1.

I'm really hoping it's soon. I wasn't overly excited/anxious (as you can tell from my other post), but I was just looking at pictures of birth announcements, Christmas cards, and newborn photos and now I'm excited and want her here NOW! I can honestly say, right now I am completely excited to meet her!

Also, since it's nice out, Matt and I went out with the camera and did some more pictures, this time of the 2 of us....the ones my mom did weren't very good...so here they are :-)

Here's the rest of the ones we took :-)

I'm due today....

I will admit, I'm scared. I'm not scared about labor and delivery, or the pain, I'm scared about meeting our daughter. I know that sounds stupid. I'm scared of what she's going to look like, whether there is going to be something physically/mentally wrong with her. I know that sounds shallow, but I am. Part of me wishes she would get here so I could know whether everything is all right with her or not.

That said, Matt and I have had a couple of long talks with her about her arrival. He's still holding out for tomorrow. The talk we had was thus: It would be very nice if she arrived later today or early tomorrow morning. MIL is leaving for NH to go to BIL and PP's tomorrow, regardless of my current status with having this baby. It would be nice if MIL could delay going until the evening and get to see her granddaughter first.

The other thing (I think) is that Matt is really getting antsy to see her. I've had a consistent relationship with her for the past several months (kicks etc), he hasn't and I think he really just wants to meet his daughter.

Obviously, regardless of anything we do/pray/ask, she's going to show up when she's good and ready.

39 Weeks 5 days

Nothing goin' here, but I did realize that I haven't written much lately about how I'm doing and how things are going . Yea, I answer all those questions in the weekly update thingy-bobber, but they don't really ask the "big" questions.

Yesterday was my first day as a "stay at home wife/mom" ...I can see how this could get very old, very quick (at least without the baby). I raked part of the front lawn (finished that today), baked cookies, and did some stuff around the house. I can't honestly say I spent the whole day feverishly cleaning the house...I didn't. I can say that I did take a 20 minute nap on the couch in the morning.

Today I got up and went to O-town for my massage and to pick up my disability/FMLA forms from the doctor and a couple of things at Wal.mart. Came home after that I went out to rake again for a bit, came in chilled out on line for a 1/2 hour, then back out to finish the lawn. The neighbor's kid asked me if I wanted him to finish blowing the leaves to the curb...so he did. Now I'm back in the house and working on a picture frame for Matt (pictures to follow).

Matt has called me "pumpkin" for a really long time, and now with our having a baby in the fall he refers to her as "little pumpkin"...I jokingly told him he's going to have quite the pumpkin patch . I bought a cheap black frame and those mini wood craft letters. Painted the letters red/orange and glued them to a frame...and voila! Really easy!

Now on to how I'm doing: I'm doing all right. I honestly can't complain. If I would, my biggest complaint would be my hand/wrist and lower back. Every night I wake up with my right hand numb...I change positions and it get's better, I fall asleep and it goes numb again. It happens throughout the day too and sometimes I have a hard time grabbing things. I'm not too worried: I've had wrist problems before and I just figure pregnancy is compounding it.

My lower back has only started in the past few days and it only starts hurting after I've been standing or doing things (raking or baking) for a while. I stop, lay down for 30 minutes and it's better. My hips are the same...more to do with what I'm doing than anything else.

Tomorrow I'm hoping to get into the chiropractor and have him adjust my back...try help this delivery along as much as possible. My massage therapist did work on my ankles (supposedly one of those induction points), nothing yet. I'm honestly not looking for this pregnancy to end...I just don't want her to be born on Halloween or in November.

Matt is convinced that she's going to be born on Sunday, the 25th. Only because we started dating the 25th of March and were married the 25th of November, so to him, it should only stand to reason that she be born on the 25th. Sounds good to me :-) I just hope she doesn't show up 2 weeks late and I'm sitting around the house, bored, for the next two weeks. If that's the case I'm going to have to start working on a quilt or something.

I've been having some cramping and tightening of my whole belly, but nothing that has a pattern to it or is time-able. I half wonder if I'm actually going to go into labor or not...only time will tell.

No news on me: Still holding steady...

I was 2cm and 50% last Thursday, I was the same at yesterday's appt...so nothing new to report in the l&d department. I could go anytime or it could be a week or 2 still. Dr G did say that she (the baby) seems quite happy in there.

Of course, I just keep thinking there are 11 days until Halloween (I really want her born before then....I don't want her to have a Halloween birthday and I don't really like November [too blah out]). For myself, I don't mind how much longer she stays in there, except for the Halloween/November thing.

Today is my last day of work though :-) WOOHOO

39 weeks 1 day

How far along: 39 Weeks 1 day
Total weight gain/loss: I think it's around 11-13 lbs, I've been holding steady where I am.
Maternity clothes: 1 pair of pants and my tees: Everything else is regular clothes.
Stretch marks: There is one that is now even with my belly button: EEK!
Sleep: Waking up about every 2 hours to pee, getting out of the bed is way too much work.
Best moment this week: Finishing more in the nursery.
Movement: Still squirming about.
Food cravings: Ice cold water
Gender: Girl!
Labor signs: I do have some tightening in my belly, slight cramping, low back pain on occasion....but who knows. I know I was 2cms and 50% effaced on Thursday.
Belly button in or out: It's out by the evening...or at least partially out.
What I miss: People not being interested in the current status of my uterus and cervix.
I am looking forward to: 2 days of work left.
Weekly wisdom: We really have no idea what we're doing lol
Milestones: I made it through the big sale at the store yesterday without going in to labor (that was everyone's fear). No I didn't work....I was home doing stuff (cleaning).

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. -- Carl Sandburg

Today I had my 38 week OB appt: Blood pressure was 120/80 (higher than the last few times), I'm still a bit iron deficient (but nothing to worry about), I'm now a solid 2cm dialated, and 50% effaced. The doctor seemed to think I could very well go in to labor before my next appt, but there's no guarantee of that.

I'm seriously hoping I don't. We're having a huge sale in the store this weekend and it just would not be at all convenient if I went in to labor. If nothing else, I'm hoping for Sunday, and my temp at work is hoping not before Tuesday. We're all just going to have to wait and see. My last day is the 20th...any time after that is good. Of course, after the OB checked my cervix I'm now losing bits and pieces of my mucus plug. Even that doesn't mean anything, it could still be weeks before I go into labor.

Of course that said, I always prepare for the "worst". I wanted to have the nursery done this past weekend and I've just about succeeded. I finished the bookcase on Friday and Matt and I carried it upstairs on Sunday and since then I've been putting the finishing touches up...I do still have picture frames to hang, but here it is:


Here's the quilt: The lady who does all of my quilting did this as a gift...if you click on the picture you can see just how fancy of a job she did quilting it...it's absolutely gorgeous.

And the room:

38 weeks 1 day

TWO WEEKS! HAHAHAHAHA! That thought just makes me laugh...I'm not really sure why, but it does.

We had our child birth education class: Let me just say "What a waste of time!" We learned nothing, the video was stupid (it had to have been filmed in 1980 - not to mention the chauvinistic opinions of the husbands), and the breathing methods they discussed were a sure-fire way to end up hyperventilating. One good thing is that we found out where we're supposed to go when I go into labor. We really were not impressed.

The other thing the nurse kept saying was how it's good to have meds, that they help you relax, and there's no harm in having them etc etc. (I know this is a controversial topic, but this is our thought process on it). We don't want meds...if I decide I need them then we'll go ahead, but there are just too many side effects on the baby and breast feeding (the whole sleepy baby who isn't interested in breast feeding after delivery thing).

Our families are going bonkers. My mom, Matt and I pretty much figure she's going to be right on time (or there abouts). MIL is absolutely convinced (or really, really hoping) that she's going to come early: There's a motive behind this.

Our niece is about 3 months older than our daughter, PP has been on maternity leave since July and is getting ready to go back to work (part time). Guess what they asked MIL? Could she come up the end of October for a few weeks to help them transition between day care and working.

When I first heard this I was a bit pissed, but then Matt explained that his mom told BIL and PP she would not be coming up until I've had our baby. Now she's desperately hoping that I go early (and constantly telling me that I have to go early), so that she can go up there (with a guilt free conscience) the end of October. Matt really feels that his brother is pushing for their mom to be with them because they want attention (Matt NEVER thinks this way about BIL, it's usually me who does).

PP's mom lives an hour away from them (MIL is 5 hrs) and she's retired...so I'm not really sure why she can't help them out. It's wonderful! BIL and PP put MIL in a difficult position, and now she's riding on me about going early (which I have told her "If this kid is anything like me, she's going to do what she wants, and it's going to be the one thing to piss off the most amount of people". She has no response to that yet.

We also had "the talk" with the mothers: We've decided that we're ok with them being in there for most of the labor, but when it comes down to pushing we want it to just be Matt and I. They're both over the moon. We did give them the stipulation that we reserve the right to revoke their presence at any time. They seemed ok with that.

Supposedly work is doing lunch for me on Wednesday: I really hate being in the spotlight. I'm really hoping that there aren't any gifts involved. I seriously do not want that...it will make me feel that much more badly about quiting.

How far along: 38 Weeks 1 day
Total weight gain/loss: Still no idea, I think my scale is stilled whacked, even with the new battery.
Maternity clothes: 1 pair of pants and my tees: Everything else is regular clothes.
Stretch marks: They're growing
Sleep: Waking up about every 2 hours to pee, getting out of the bed is getting interesting.
Best moment this week: Finishing more in the nursery.
Movement: Still squirming about.
Food cravings: Ice cold water
Gender: Girl!
Labor signs: No idea.
Belly button in or out: It's starting to poke out at times (full bladder, eating etc)
What I miss: My knuckles not being swollen: I've always kind of had finger issues (during the summer they swell and hurt when it's too hot). I actually have to wait about 30 minutes in the morning before I can get my wedding band on. It's not all the time that the rest of my fingers are swollen, but enough that it hurts.
I am looking forward to: 7 days of work left.
Weekly wisdom: We really have no idea what we're doing lol
Milestones: 38 weeks and still swing dancing! (we had a wedding last night and I still managed to dance a couple of fox trots and a swing in 2" heels: GO ME!)

37 weeks 1 day

How far along: 37 Weeks 1 day
Total weight gain/loss: Dr's scale says 11lbs, I just bought new batteries for our scale...will check that tomorrow
Maternity clothes: 1 pair of pants and my tees: Everything else is regular clothes.
Stretch marks: Let's just say they're really not pretty under the flourescent lights of a changing room with a full length mirror
Sleep: Starting to hurt a bit more...I'm glad we have the bed we do (wrought iron headboard) or I seriously would not be able to get out of bed.
Best moment this week: Getting the car seat installed
Movement: Yup, she's doing a lot more big stretches and seems to be moving southward.
Food cravings: Ice cold water
Gender: Girl!
Labor signs: I think I'm having BH, but I'm not sure, but there is definitely a certain amount of pain in my pelvic region...I'm assuming things are stretching and moving down there.
Belly button in or out: It's still in, but looking pretty stretched
What I miss: My knuckles not being swollen: I've always kind of had finger issues (during the summer they swell and hurt when it's too hot). I actually have to wait about 30 minutes in the morning before I can get my wedding band on. It's not all the time that the rest of my fingers are swollen, but enough that it hurts.
I am looking forward to: 2 weeks of work!!!!!! Getting the nursery finished next weekend.
Weekly wisdom: We really have no idea what we're doing lol
Milestones: Surprising people when I tell them that I have 3 weeks left....they all think I have more to go.

Here's the pictures: I've been curious how I look from behind and straight on...whether I am "all over pregnant" or just in the front.

36 Week OB Appt.

Had another OB appointment, now I go weekly until the end. Of course, I still haven't seen the doctor since she did an ultrasound the end of June to guess whether it was a boy or a girl. The NP said that she is putting it on my chart that I see Dr. G...I said to her that it would be nice to actually see the DOCTOR before the hospital room. Anyways....they did the Group B Strep swab today...very exciting. Next week they're going to check my iron again...I'm hoping it's just fine. Here's the stats from today:

*My blood pressure is 110/62 (doesn't that sound low...it's usually 115/75-ish)
*Total weight gain is 11 lbs
*Measuring exactly 36 weeks
*Baby is definitely moving southward, her head is right against my cervix
*Cervix is still thick, but approximately a fingertip (we all know that means absolutely nothing).

There's no reasons to believe I'll go early or anything like that...so 4 more weeks it is. The NP did ask about pressure/cramping/etc low in my abdomen...I said "Yes, sometimes it actually hurts a bit, but I figure it's just her pushing against my cervix". She seemed to think that it could be BH contraction. Who knows.

36 weeks 1 day

First off I want to thank everyone for all of your kind words of advice and support: It's one of the things I absolutely love about this community! So, THANK YOU!

How far along: 36 Weeks 1 day
Total weight gain/loss: I think my weight is holding steady at 7-9 lbs of gain from my Pre-PG weight.
Maternity clothes: 1 pair of pants and my tees: Everything else is regular clothes.
Stretch marks: Yes they branch out from the underside of my belly toward my hips...weird
Sleep: Not too much of an issue, I get up 1-3 times to go pee, but fall back to sleep...my back and belly/sides sometimes hurt.
Best moment this week: I honestly don't know.
Movement: Yup, she's doing a lot more big stretches and seems to be moving southward.
Food cravings: Ice cold water
Gender: Girl!
Labor signs: None...If I'm having BH, I don't know it it
Belly button in or out: It's still in, but looking pretty stretched
What I miss: Sleeping on my back...I wake up there sometimes (in spite of pillows). It seriously is so much more comfortable than my sides, especially with the belly.
I am looking forward to: 3 weeks of work!!!!!!
Weekly wisdom: We really have no idea what we're doing lol
Milestones: 36 weeks...that's a milestone to me :-)



It's been one of those grungy "around the house" kind of days here: You can see that I am sporting the disheveled "I've been laying on the couch hair" along with the always sexy husband's college sweats, and a regular shirt of mine that no longer fits: I'm a regular fashionista!

The Last 24th

One month from today is my due date: Holy COW! As of Saturday I'll be 36 weeks and there's only 28 days left! I'm kind of starting to freak out a bit, in a bunch of different ways.

1) There's still all these little things that need to be done: Finish the room, install the car seat, get the car seat inspected, make sure we have all the things we're going to need, contact list of people to call, hospital bags, music/cameras etc for the delivery room, schedule care for our dogs, who's going to be in the room with us, when will people come in, finish reading our delivery books, start reading about the vaccines and decide on those, clean the house, order the pack n play, get the cosleeper set up, we still need sheets for both, and about a 1000 things more I honestly can't think of or about because they start giving me an anxiety attack.

2) Am I going to be able to do this? Push a baby out of my crotch without drugs? What if I can't? What if something goes wrong? What if I need drugs? Will I feel like a loser since I went that path? I have moments when I feel entirely pumped and that I WILL be able to do this...it will be hard, but I'm strong and able to do this, then I have moments when I think "Can't someone just hand me a baby so I don't have to do this?! Because what if I can't?"

3) Am I going to be able to breast feed? Should we rent a pump from the hospital? Should we have a can of formula on hand in case we need to supplement? Should I order the LactAid at breast supplementer? Do I have enough bottles here if we need to do formula?

4) Is everything ok with her? I feel like I'm back in the beginning of this pregnancy: Checking her heart rate, pushing to get her to kick so I know she's ok. What if she's too small? I haven't gained much weight? What if there's something wrong with her health wise and it's because I haven't gained much weight?

5) I thought I had 9 months to decide about work....now we probably have about 9 weeks to decide. We still have to find health insurance: How are we going to pay for it (we do have about 3 months of insurance premiums saved up)? How do I tell work I'm not coming back? When do I tell work I'm not coming back (especially since we really don't know for sure yet)?

6) We're going to be solely responsible for this little person! Who are we to be having a kid? What do we know about this? Uhhh...I have some experience, but not enough to shake a stick at. What if we entirely screw this up?

7) Is this real? Or is this some sick joke. Am I really not pregnant (in spite of my growing belly, the heart rate, the ultrasounds, the doctor appts, feeling her kick and move etc etc)? What if I'm not an people have been playing us: How am I going to explain THAT to people?

8) Is there something wrong with me? I haven't gained much weight (I've actually lost 3lbs in the past 2 weeks); I haven't had an Braxton Hicks. Is my body doing what it should to prepare for delivery? What if delivery is just some arbitrary thing and it isn't going to happen at all? What if I have to be induced/c-section? Will I even know when/what contractions are?

9) Am I the only one who isn't anxious for her to be born? I'm seriously dreading sharing her with the rest of the world (except Matt). I don't want anyone else seeing her or holding her, she's OUR'S DAMMIT! I'm having major separation anxiety about her not being in my body where I can protect her and keep her safe.

10) What if I have major depression issues (a possibility for me) after she's born, because: I didn't get the delivery I want, I can't breastfeed, she's a difficult baby, or any of a thousand other issues.


Then I tell my mind to SHUT UP! To stop putting all these doubts, worries, and fears in my head. And I know that whatever will be, will be, and it will all be all right and there's nothing I can change about anything that happens...it's not in my hands or Matt's or the doctor's. It's entirely in God's hands...he's led us this far. Through 3 years of infertility, being told Matt and I will never have a child together, Matt's back problems, BIL and PP having a whoops pregnancy before we ever got pregnant.

We got through it all and we will get through everything ahead: Will it be easy? Not always, but we'll do it together...with God.