Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are.

We've certainly had a lot of adversity in the past 2 years...what with IF and Matt's back. It certainly has proven to us, how strong we are in ourselves, our faith, and in our relationship.

That said: I suppose I'm ready to grapple with this beast: Cystic Fribrosis (CF). Our RE called on Wednesday to discuss the results of my bloodwork and informed me that I am a carrier for Cystic Fibrosis:
"Did you know that?"
"No, I had no idea."
"We'd like to test your husband."

I won't lie. My heart fell into my stomach when they told me that. The only thing I knew is that CF is not good. It's one of those diseases you hear about, but hope to God you never deal with. I immediately went to mayoclinic and started researching it. Now the only question that remains unanswered, for me, is whether or not carriers can have some of the symptoms. The mild symptoms that I read about (heat tolerance, thick mucus, chronic sinus infections) are things that I deal with: May just be a coincidence.

They faxed over the bloodwork request and now Matt has to go and have bloodwork done. I was completely flabbergasted and at a loss. Prior to this I had no real idea of what CF even is. My parents were shocked to find out that I'm a carrier. There's no one in our family that has ever had CF or been tested for being a carrier.

At first I was adamant that he be tested. Then, I became less adamant and more ambivalent. Yes there is a 1 in 4 chance (IF we are both carriers) that a child of ours would have CF; However, that wouldn't stop us from having children. The chances that Matt is a CF carrier are pretty slim. Now I'm to the point that I want Matt to be tested, if only for our own peace of mind (I'm a worrier). Matt hasn't really had too much to say about the whole thing. He's got a lot of other things on his mind.

Matt's surgery is scheduled for tomorrow morning. Prayfully everything goes swimmingly. We both have our own set of concerns and issues with the surgery. The bottom line: We're both afraid that the surgery isn't going to solve his pain OR the surgery creates more problems and he's having to have multiple back surgeries for the rest of his life. Hopefully neither of these happen and he feels immediate relief from the surgery and his back becomes strong once again and we don't have to think about this for a very long, LONG time.

Most of yesterday we just putzed around the house: Matt brewed another batch of beer and I worked on a sewing project all day. I'll have to post a picture.