We got two awesome bits of news today: 1) Matt's surgery has been approved by Workers' Comp and is scheduled for next Tuesday and 2) They say that his check is in the mail (it's been only my income, since Matt went out on disability)! We're really happy that it's been less time than we imagined. Of course, now I'm nervous about the whole having surgery thing.
I just started my next week in my First Place, "Choosing Thankfulness". It always amazes me how relevant the weeks readings are to what is going on in our lives. This weeks topic is "The Privelege of Prayer": How amazing is it to know that our God wants us to pray to Him, to seek Him out and pour out our burdens, and praises, to Him. It went on to discuss Psalm 61 (http://tinyurl.com/252lp4) and David's cry to God to hear his prayers as his heart was growing week, to provide him with a shelter and his desire to remain in God's protection forever. "We can always be thankful, even in the worst circumstances because our Lord has promised to never leave us or forsake us" (pg. 72).
I know for myself, from my own experiences, I rarely seek God in trouble. I desperately pray to Him for help and guidance. However, I'm like a child who stands outside in the middle of the storm screaming at the top of my lungs for someone to help, waiting for someone to come and take me by the hand; knowing that if I would have an ounce of faith and move toward God I would find shelter. I think it's pretty common for us to become dumbfounded and just stand crying, rather than actively seeking God's shelter and burying ourselves in Him.
One of the girls on the nest has been a phenomenal example of seeking God and resting in His shelter. Her and her husband have been through such an emotional ride in the past week, as they were awaiting word on a prospective adoption. It's just amazing to me through the whole thing her faith in God and her peace at His will: While being at peace with God's will doesn't mean we're not heartbroken by it.
I know for myself and for Matt, we're at relative peace with God's will for children in our future. We know that God has a wonderful plan for us, but knowing that His plan will be more wonderful than we could imagine doesn't make it any easier to accept when His plan and our's doesn't coincide. Through it all though he's there. Even when we're disappointed by the variances in the plans, he's still with us and wanting to shelter us and help ease our pain. Of course, we can be angry and saddened by it, as long as we accept that He knows best. We're allowed to experience those emotions, as long as we turn to Him.
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